Bound To Me (Leather #1) Page 19
“Yeah. I mean, no. I mean, I guess I could. I don’t know.” He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, hating that he was so worried about messing up that he might actually do it.
“Let’s go back a little further. How are things with your family?”
Fuck this bullshit again. This is never going to work…
Chapter 21
In addition to ice cream, there was nothing in the world that a fabulous pedicure couldn’t solve or improve. Addison sat with her feet in warm water being massaged by jets. It was the surrounding warmth that brought all her thoughts back to Decland, his shower and the way she’d been feeling all day. The vivid picture she had of him in her mind kept playing over in her head—his chiseled jaw flexing as he fought the urge to be rough, the way his lips felt on her skin, his hair dripping water as she looked her in the eyes and whispered I’m falling for you.
“Hello… Earth to Addison.” Jeffrey’s voice cut into her thoughts from beside her.
She jolted, looking at him. “Hhmm, what did you say?”
“The girl asked you to make sure she had the right color before she put it on.”
Addison looked at the small woman sitting at her feet holding the bottle of pink nail polish. She nodded. “Yeah, that’s fine.” She paused for a moment. “No, wait. I want red. Like siren red.”
The woman pushed away from Addison, sliding on the small stood, then stood up and walked away toward the wall of polish. Addison swung her toes in the water allowing them to drift around.
“Oh, honey, you got it bad.” Neely sighed from the other side of Jeffrey. Addison looked over at the two of them leaning forward, staring at her like she’d grown six heads.
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about how you’re totally falling for the fuckable bastard,” Neely teased.
“He’s not a bastard.” She sighed. “Not really. Decland is—”
“Hold up, we’re calling him Decland?” Jeffrey laughed as he exchanged a look with Neely.
“Ugh, you guys suck. You know that?” She sat back in her chair, pouting.
They both broke out in laughter. Neely tossed a dry hand towel at her. “Come on, Addy. You know we love you. Plus, we’re a little jealous.”
Addison threw the towel back, unable to fight off the smile that threatened her lips. “Good, you should be jealous.”
“Honey, if I had a guy who made me want to paint my toes siren red, you better believe I’d be bragging about it,” Jeffrey added.
Addison whispered, “Okay, last night in the shower—”
Jeffrey’s eyes widened. “Oh, my God. The shower?”
Addison nodded, but Jeffrey’s cell phone started to ring. He held up his finger. “Hold that thought. I had all the calls from the office directed to my cell.” He hit the button accepting the call. “Doctor Tyler’s office. This is Jeffrey. How may I assist you?”
Addison watched as he listened intently to the caller, his best professional face on, even though the pedicurist was scrubbing the bottom of his feet and he looked like he was about to explode into laughter. He cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, Doctor Mertz, she isn’t available at the moment. May I take a message?”
Addison stuck her tongue out at him teasingly. She was struggling with her own tickling feet as the woman dried them, readying her for her vixen-like nail polish.
Jeffrey’s eyes widened. “And this is in reference to Mr. Wallace?”
Addison’s head snapped up. She motioned for the phone, waving her hands wildly. Jeffrey paused looking at Addison like she was crazy. “Oh, Doctor Mertz, she just became available. I’ll see if I can grab her. Hold, please.” Addison practically leapt off the tan massaging chair to grab the phone. Jeffrey held it at arm’s length, covering the receiver. Holding her back with one arm, he hissed, “You need to be cool. Act like I just got your attention.”
She took a deep breath, her heart racing as she took the phone in hand. “Hello, this is Doctor Tyler.”
“Doctor Tyler, so glad I could reach you. It’s Doctor Mertz.”
“What can I do for you, Doctor Mertz?” She wanted to rip whatever he had to say about Decland out of his mouth. A cold sweat covered her skin as she waited for his reply.
“Well, I have a new patient who used to be one of your patients.”
“Who is it?” Of course, she already knew but had to play along.
“Decland Wallace.” He cleared his throat.
“Yes, he used to be a patient of mine,” she admitted while remaining guarded. “What may I assist you with?”
The doctor sighed on the other line. “Well, it was quite interesting. He used you as a reference, so I’m assuming it’s okay that we speak about his history.”
She didn’t know if it was okay or not, but she had to know exactly what he was doing with Dr. Mertz and why he decided not to tell her about it. “I think that’ll be fine.”
“It’s quite odd, really. He seems well put together, gainfully employed and by definition, an attractive man.”
“I agree.” She slid lower into the chair holding her breath, waiting for him to get to the point.
“But he mentions that he has issues when it comes to commitment. He is able to remain interested for a short time. A year, it appears, is his normal pattern of behavior. However, it seems to me that this particular man only enjoys the chase, the hunt if you will. It’s getting what he thinks he can’t have. But once he’s got it, he no longer wants it. Rather child-like if you ask me.”
Addison’s heart started to race. It was one thing for him to admit it in her office and not bring it up again once they were together. Had she played right into his hands? “Was he exhibiting any irrational behavior?”
Mertz scoffed. “Only when I tried to talk about his childhood. Got all worked up telling me it wasn’t about his family. But I can’t help but think a reaction that defensive is a sign that something worse happened that he’s unwilling to speak about.”
“I actually think the opposite.” She stood, waving to the pedicurist to let her get up. She felt the cool brush of paint fly across the top of her foot as she walked toward the back of the salon out of earshot away from Jeffrey and Neely. She could feel their eyes on her as she walked away. “I think that he knows there isn’t a problem with his past, so he’s looking for immediate solutions. A reason for his problem, like what causes it.”
“Hmm, could be.”
“Has he mentioned anything about a current relationship?” She knew she was crossing the line, but she just couldn’t stop herself. The last thing she needed was to fall for him when he wanted to leave her. Was he just toying with her?
“Yes, he did mention it briefly. He seemed worried about it. Frustrated even. Like he can’t control it.”
“Can’t control what?” Addison blurted out too quickly.
Doctor Mertz cleared his throat, pausing. “It seems to me he gets himself in a downward spiral where he continually gets bored with the day to day and then he leaves.”
Addison covered her mouth, holding back the little cry of pain she wanted to let out. She swallowed it back down, remembering that she had to remain professional. “Do you feel that Mr. Wallace has already lost interest in his newest relationship?”
“I think he is interested in this relationship but not for the right reasons. Seems he has something to prove, like he wants to see if he can actually do it. Seems to be a moot point now, though.”
She was not getting the answers she needed to hear from him. Was Decland going to leave her? Her hands shook as she began to panic. “In your professional opinion, is this relationship about to fail?”
“Well, I believe he’s losing interest. If this is a trend for him, I’d say the downward spiral has already begun, so perhaps the next relationship will work for him. But it seems to be too late for this one.”
Her body felt like it had been doused with a bucket of ice water. Tears threatened to spill over her cheeks as she took
a deep breath. “Then I suggest you keep working with him on this. Perhaps with time he will improve. It’s important that he learn the proper techniques to form a lasting commitment and find satisfaction in his relationships. Not always looking to move toward the next best thing or what he perceives as better.”
“I quite think so. But I wanted to know if you’d run up against his hesitation to talk about is family as I have. But it seems as though you have as well. I’ll focus on moving forward with him, not rehashing his past childhood. Thank you for your suggestions, Doctor Tyler. Insightful as always.”
“Not a problem. Call me if you need anything else.” She didn’t want him to ever call again.
“Have a lovely day.”
“You too.” As she pressed the end button, she sunk to the ground feeling like she couldn’t breathe.
“Addison?” Neely called. “Addison, are you okay?”
She pulled herself back to her feet. Squaring her shoulders, she turned around. Holding her chin up, she walked back toward the chairs. “I’m fine.”
“Oh, honey, whatever he did just tell me so I can nail his balls to the wall,” Neely demanded.
“No, it’s fine.” Addison climbed back in the chair, her mind racing. What was she going to do? How was she going to stop this from happening?
“I say, if he’s being a dick then you don’t need him. What did Doctor Mertz say?” Jeffrey asked trying to seem light but failing.
Addison waved him off, not willing to answer his question just yet. Even if she wanted to, the words were stuck in her throat choking her. A knot formed in her throat—that disgusting ball that erupted right before you cried.
“That’s right, we’ll kick his balls,” Neely added quickly as she eyed Addison with concern.
Her friends both went into Addison-crisis-mode, and she was yet to tell them everything. Her face must’ve said it all. The start of heartbreak already showed in her eyes. “I know.”
“Besides, we aren’t the type to get all depressed and cry,” Neely insisted, never being one to lose her shit over a guy, let alone cry about one. “We don’t get depressed. We get even.”
Get even? He’d toyed with her. Last night he said he was falling for her; now today he was over it? Dick. Who was he to fuck with her emotions? Determination overcame her. She wasn’t going to sit here and cry. She was going to get all the information, and if that wasn’t what she wanted to hear, she as going to get even. You screw me, I’ll screw you back. I’m a lady like that. She felt a dark smile spread across her face. “You’re completely right.”
“Huh?” they both said.
As the pedicurist began wiping away the red polish she’d messed up, Addison wiggled her toes. “Keep them red.”
“Addison, honey, I don’t like the look you have on your face.” Neely leaned forward. “I’m a little worried.”
“You have nothing to worry about. He has something to worry about,” she snapped, sitting back in her chair, crossing her arms.
“Do you want me to cancel your afternoon appointment? Maybe you should go talk to him,” Jeffrey added gently.
“No, I’ll finish my day.” She smiled a little too hard. They both flinched back.
“Maybe you should just go talk to him now,” Neely recommended.
“Oh, I’ll go talk to him, and if he doesn’t get his shit straight, no more Mrs. Nice Doctor,” she huffed. “And to think… I gave him a BJ under a table. Ugh.”
“You what?” they both yelled in unison, mouths left gaping open.
Chapter 22
As Addison sat with her long time patients in front of her, she realized they’d hit a metaphorical wall, and it wasn’t just because she felt like she’d hit the same wall. Dan and Elaine Pretcher had been married for years, and yet here they sat both mutually unsatisfied yet still clinging to each other. Addison smoothed her hand over the high bun she’d thrown on the crown of her head as she stormed out of the salon. Shifting in her chair, she attempted to put aside her own emotional trauma to help her patients. She crossed her legs, giving them a level stare. “Dan, Elaine, we’ve been talking about this for months. Now is the time for action. Do you want this marriage to work?”
Running his hands nervously through his salt and pepper hair, Dan reached out to grasp his wife’s hand. Their arms extended over the length of the dark brown leather couch. He sat at one end and she at the other like they were worlds apart. Admittedly, Elaine had forced Dan into coming to these sessions, but it was clear from their ridged posture that these two needed help. Dan looked up at Addison with grave, aging brown eyes that were surround by slight wrinkles made from a lifetime of smiles. His dark blue plaid shirt seemed to grow smaller with each deep breath he took. “Of course I want my marriage to work. But these are things better left to deal with in private.”
With a sigh, Addison dropped her notepad and pen into her lap trying to hold on to what little patience she had left. It wasn’t their fault her boyfriend was a dick. She lowered her voice, speaking softly like she was trying to help a friend. “Forgive my bluntness, but if this is working for you at home then what are you doing here?” She was always direct with her patients. There was no time to pussyfoot around when it came to the state of relationships. Fuckable bastard. Couples needed results, not to be overly therapized for years while their lives slowly diminished. She didn’t have time for his shit.
Dan looked to Elaine for support. She nodded, her light blond hair falling into her eyes. “We need this.” The sharp planes of her face looked more severe with the heavy emotional weight in the room.
Addison folded her hands and sat back in her chair, the leather creaking as she slid farther back in her seat. The cool upholstery was calming through her black pencil skirt. “Dan, when you first walked into my office, I told you that this was a hands-on experience. I am here as a guide to teach you about each other and for you to learn as you grow.” Dan opened his mouth to speak. Raising her hand, she silenced him. “Now, this is not some hippy show where we are about feeling the love. I’m here to help you rebuild that connection, or in this case, learn to express yourselves sexually. Can you honestly tell me what positions Elaine likes in bed?”
Shaking his head, he dropped Elaine’s hand and began to wring his own. “No, I can’t.” As he looked over at Elaine, he sighed. “I remember a time when it was so effortless between us. What happened?”
Addison smiled. “That’s what we’re here to find out.” This man clearly loved his wife. “Elaine, can you tell me what positions you like?”
Clearing her throat, Elaine tugged at the sleeves of her soft yellow cardigan. “I like it when he’s on top of me.”
“So, missionary position?” Addison confirmed. Decland is great at missionary. Hate him so much right now. Elaine nodded, not looking in her husband’s direction. “Are there any other positions you prefer or would like to try?”
Raising her hand to her lips, she shrugged nervously. “I just don’t know.”
“And that is what we are here to explore. I’m not going to make you jump in and have sex right away. Sex is only a physical act, but finding pleasure in each other, knowing your partner’s body, and intimate connection is what you are looking for.” It was killing her to sit here and tell this couple to have all the things that she felt she and Decland already had. Maybe that was part of the game for him. She bit her bottom lip, trying to focus on her clients. “This is not health class. This is the two of you working and listening to me to find the heat again. Dan, is there anything that you’d like to experience with your wife?”
His shoulders bobbed awkwardly as he nodded with raised eyebrow. “I-I’d,” he stammered and cleared his throat. “I’d like to have more foreplay.” He rubbed his hands over his beige pants, turning to watch his wife’s reaction.
Addison smiled. “Very good, Dan. Elaine, how do you feel about foreplay? Is it something you’d like to share with Dan?”
Elaine squared her shoulders as if she were ready
to do war. “Yes, I think so.”
Addison clapped her hands together. “Now have you been doing your homework? Touching each other at home casually? Getting used to being in each other’s personal space?” They both nodded. “Then I think it’s time to move forward. As long as you two are ready to do so?”
Again, they nodded in silence, the nervous awkwardness heavy in the air as quiet, unspoken words hung in the room. Addison tilted her head to the side, knowing that she could help these two, knowing that when they left this office today they would begin to find what they needed. It might be too late for her and Decland, but it wasn’t too late for this couple. They were committed to each other, something she knew Decland wouldn’t understand. “We have gone over this in detail before, but I’d like to reiterate to be clear. At no point during this session will I put my hands on either one of you. You will both be responsible for listening and following my directions.”
They continued to nod, eyes on the ground. Addison could feel the heat of their gaze burning a hole in her black MK heels. She hoped the red nail polish wasn’t smeared all over the inside of them. “This week we will be focusing on foreplay and touching.”
Dan looked up, surprised. “No sex?”
There it was, that one spark of male desire. “Not this session. We’ve gone over in detail what you two want but you’re unable to execute alone. Here, you are in a private, safe space where you can move further. But for today—foreplay.” Addison stood, looking around her office, getting ready to show her clients the other room she had to use of. “Elaine, please go through that door.” She pointed to a dark wooden door in the back of the office that led to a dressing room. “Remove all of your clothes, and please select a robe. Once you are prepared, there is another door back there that will lead you to our second therapy room. I will meet you in there.” Turning toward Dan, she motioned to another door on the opposite wall from where she’d sent Elaine. “Dan, kindly go through that door and do the same thing.”